I graduated from College this past Spring, with a BA in Human Development. People often ask me what that really means, and the best way to explain it is to lump it into the same category and realm as Psychology (minus all the applied research). I chose this as my major because I was a floater in school. I didn't know what the heck I wanted to do or who I wanted to be. So I took a couple of intro Psych courses in college and although I wasn't sure what I wanted to do after graduating, I kept on a floatin'.
Well now I feel like I made the wrong choice. Big time. I think. I THINK?!!!
This is where the Quarterlife crisis comes in. It is a great book that was recommended to me and although it helps to reassure me that as a mid twenty-something, I am not alone in my confusions, my fears, and my doubts, I still have a nagging feeling that I have no clue what the hell I'm supposed to be doing and it's preventing me from living my life to the fullest.
I recently got a job working in a residential treatment center/school in a dorm with young children who have very serious problems. I'm sick as a dog already and I just started my first day of training yesterday! I had to skip today and won't be back until next week when I feel well enough. But again, I am just not sure this is the right job for me. I need to have a steady job and I need to make money, so I am going to stick it out and see what happens. But I want more than anything to be happy in what I do every day.
What makes me happy: I love to write. I always have, always will. I could have majored in journalism or literature, but I didn't. I'm not sure why.
What also makes me happy: Fashion. I wanted to possibly attend FIDM after I graduated high school, but I didn't want to move away to Los Angeles or San Diego and leave the security of home. So I didn't. Becoming a fashion buyer would be my ultimate dream job!
The bottom line is that I sacrificed my true loves because I was scared, lazy, and lacked the discipline and motivation to really make things happen for myself. I settled for a major that looked "good on paper", that would satisfy my need to be considered smart by others, that I thought would allow me to feel fulfilled by helping others. Now, I am thinking about going back to school, maybe take a few fashion and writing courses. But there is also this part of me that thinks I should go back and get my Master's, possibly in school or college counseling so I can be an academic advisor. See? So many options! I go back and forth 100 times in a day.
So, to any of you bloggers out there who have felt this way, please share a bit of your struggles with me! I would love to hear from you. Also, to those of you working in the fashion industry now, just in case I ever decide to go that route: any advice for someone like me who has no experience at all? Where do I even begin?
If you stuck this one out, Thank You for reading!